I suppose a good first step would be to proffer .02 as to why I joined this posse. It’s not as though this was an arduous decision-making process (I mean, have you checked out this amazing list? I’m honored to be counted among them!), but at the same I’ve generally eschewed participating too deeply in women-centric … things. It’s not that I don’t care about the advancement of women in business and technology it’s just that … well … you know that quote from Groucho Marx about not wanting to belong to a club that would have him as a member? It’s kind of like that.

I entered the tech sector in the early 90’s. It was a time when I was often the only skirt – literally or otherwise – in the room. When I did cross the path of another woman I found it went one of two ways – we bonded immediately and began looking for ways to support each other … or the air was sucked from the room as eyes narrowed and claws began to unsheath.

Though it might seem to be the more repellent of the two, the latter scenario is not the reason I’ve stayed away from engaging specifically with women’s groups. Those viper-ish women are generally pretty easy to spot and so easy enough to avoid. They’re also, thankfully, the rare exception to the rule. No, my issue – and I may be excoriated for saying this – is that my experience of women’s gatherings has been an all-too-frequent emphasis on the obstacles we face … because we’re women. Yes, the glass ceiling exists, but I sometimes feel that in waving the female flag in an overly enthusiastic manner we oftentimes discredit our own efforts.

And that’s precisely what I said in the Dennis Howlett article that brought me into direct orbit with the Technically Women gang. (In the “shameless plug” field, you can find my commentary for that article directly here.). Our virtual conversation about the article, sharing our thoughts and perspectives, was conducted by email yet had a distinct feeling of a late night hangout by a fire pit drinking great wine. So when a post article discussion began about our teaming up for a blog, it took all of a nanosecond to decide.

I’ve always held that the best way to cut through that translucent blockade are to pretend it’s not there. Focus. Do your work. Be accountable. Always push the envelope. Over the years I’ve participated in a few different variations of women’s groups – almost all of which focused more on giving women a place to commiserate and support each other than they did in providing any sort of professional support. There is value to that, certainly, but it wasn’t enough of the picture for me. I found organizations like Women in Technology and the Anita Borg Institute, that were helping foster connection and development among women, but still there was something lacking. More recently the emergence and solid growth of organizations like Girls in Tech and Women 2.0 have continued down the path, bringing a new generation’s perspective on what it means to be a dame with some moxie in business.

With the emerging support network, came my increased interest to exercise my voice as a woman in the industry. I had my own blog, along with my real-time thoughts on Twitter, but I sought something more substantive. In the summer of last year, a new site out of the UK BitchBuzz launched with a tagline calling it the site “for feisty women with their knickers in a twist”, and invited me to contribute. Though it’s targeted to and written by women, as far as my writing for BitchBuzz goes, it skews less to female focus and more to tongue-welded firmly in cheek views of technology’s impact on society. What better to add to the mix than a place like this that’s designed to address women’s issues and topics, from a place of strength, empowerment and resolution.

Technically Women is the perfect complement to my evolving membership in this club and I look forward to the conversations we get started!

In my experience, here’s how what women know translates into business performance:

• Women know high risk comes with high potential upsides and high potential downsides. We tend not to get overly excited about what could be and focus on what can be today. That focus means we we more likely translate current market needs into solutions that will pay off today but we may not be as likely to go for the long shot ventures.

• Women know relationships and know that the more open and transparent we are, the closer the relationships are that we can foster. This allows us to form really persistent relationships with employees, partners, and customers – and not through the use of money and rewards – which is more profitable and less vulnerable. See Diane Hessan’s excellent example of Return on Openness.

• Women know how valuable communication is – at all levels. That means a lot of us are chatty (it’s been proven) but it also means the people around us are never left in doubt of what is going on. That means there is less distrust and gives others the chance to bring up any issues they see.

• Women know how to navigate emotional conflict better and interestingly have an easier time discussing deep rooted differences of opinion between colleagues in a more collegial fashion. This allows for conflict resolution before things escalate into business problems.

• Women know how to identify subtle social queues and can identify whether or not someone is being open with us – whether we choose to acknowledge that or not. This allows women to more accurately assess relationships with customers and others.

• Women know that telling people what to do is not the most effective way to lead. Showing by example and using Socratic methods of mentoring often facilitates the response we desire without the negative side affects of the other party feeling controlled.

• Women know complexity. We can never focus on just work, or just money, or just family. It is always about the best decision for everyone rather than the best decision for any one constituent. This gives us a balanced perspective of a business and keeps us from maximizing revenue in the short term if it damages relationships in the long term – thus preserving sustainability and long term profits.

This is not to say that women are better and that this is true for all women (or that men don’t have these qualities) but bringing women into leadership positions will bring a diversity of approach, a different perspective, and some much needed skills to the board room. In a business environment where transparency and relationships are becoming core principals of business how can you afford not to bring more of those skills into your business?

From a personal perspective *not* having more of those qualities in companies is what has driven me to start my own. I don’t want to work in an environment that doesn’t understand balance, is driven to ‘win’ at all costs, and only values relationships while they result in revenue. It’s not what I am about and the more senior I get, the more aligning my values with the businesses I associate with matter to me. Is that a zero sum rule? Of course not – women don’t tend to view things that way and I certainly don’t.

What do you think? Is this too generalized? Do you think this is a sexist perspective? Does it reflect the women leaders that you know?

Don’t know the woman in the picture? That’s Indra Nooyi wife of a former boss of mine (who was quite a smart cookie himself) and CEO of Pepsi – great to see!